First Impressions

Lately at work, I’ve been told the following:

1. I should smile more lest I give people the wrong impression
2. I look fierce when I don’t smile
3. I always have the grumpy or deep-in-thought look
4. When I joined the company, I was very quiet (and appeared old)

 

On “I should smile more lest I give people the wrong impression”:

I burst out laughing when I heard it. It was a totally random comment, from someone unexpected, yet I had ironically seen it coming. Call it guilty conscience or what; I dozed off right under his nose during the meeting in the morning (aye old habits die hard) and I was sulking the entire time when meeting with him again later that day. Other than the fact that I was extremely annoyed by his ethnocentrism (as I usually am), I was in a particularly bad mood that day because one, I had a makeup blooper which made me look and feel (and look even more) grumpy, two, I was feeling constipated and fat (the digestion pill I took the night before was not working) and three, there was the post-Haji holiday blues to top it all. However, the way he said it in a concerned manner made it funny. I laughed it off and explained that I wasn’t sulking in defiance even though that’s how I may usually look. This brings me to the next point.

On “I look fierce when I don’t smile”:

It’s not the first time I’ve heard this, I know I look hostile when I don’t smile. Those were the days when I went to class looking grumpy (and I mean really grumpy) cos of insufficient sleep, mad morning traffic yada yada. I think I’ve become less grouchy since graduating from school but I still look like it, unintentionally, and there’s nothing much I can do about it (it’s unfortunate I have hard features, I could practise smiling to myself, like a fool, every now and then).

On “I always have the grumpy or deep-in-thought look”:

“Deep in thought” sounds intelligent, except I am hardly thinking about anything behind that facade. You know, the times when you simply zone out and let your mind wander to nowhere before you’re forced to come back to reality. I much rather give people the impression that I’m deep in thought than come across as someone unapproachable but like I said, there’s nothing much I can do about it.

On “When I joined the company, I was very quiet (and appeared old)”:

I’m not sure if anybody feels the same way, I usually feel compelled to make conversation with someone I just got to know even though I’d rather not be the one getting the conversation going. That said, I don’t usually try to initiate a conversation with a stranger. But once we’re acquainted, I feel the need to engage in conversation. However, I started work pretty guarded to the new environment and people. As someone new joining the company, it felt like I was intruding the familial relationships already forged. It didn’t help that I saw many people leaving soon after. It took me a while before I got to know the people and be comfortable with them. I suppose looking hostile and old (LOL) made it even harder. Everyone thought I looked older than my age cos I did my hair up in a ponytail then (thanks to pure laziness to blow dry the hair). It’s hilarious to hear about it after I changed my hairstyle, which was also about when we got comfortable enough to make such digs at one another.

 

Hmm I wonder what other first impressions I left on others?

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